She Called Me “Petty.”

Hey Vulnerabites…. Let me begin with my reverse Beyonce lyrics… “I AM Sorry!” I’m sorry because I was considering hanging an “OUT OF ORDER” sign over our “Naked Space.” In light of that, I want to thank my dear friend Ms.McCullough for calling me “petty” two days ago.#RollingMyEyes. Snuggle up My Vulnerabites, we are going to get cozy!

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naked-writer

Let me keep it “one-hunnen” with you… this blog space is a continual ‘heart check’ for me — it forces me to ask myself, “WHY are you doing this Mac?” — When I started this blog with “Confidently Insecure”, it was to create an authentic space where I could be “human in my faith” — because we all know the “Saints” are semi-divine beings, and I’m not that — and invite others to join me here. If my goal is to create an ‘intimate’ space, than perhaps my desire for 500 likes, shares and followers is rooted in something else. I’ma call this devil by it’s name— The need to be important is bothering me. Why don’t I have more subscribers? Why aren’t more people commenting? Why don’t I have more views? Why do I even have to ask people to share the blog? Isn’t that what people do when they’ve had a good read— maybe my blogs just aren’t a good read… Hhhmmm… Lol. Where are all the people who raved about my writing and haven’t even subscribed? — And don’t get me started on the responses that never come when I share my new post in a group text. HHHmmm… #2, we’re not going there, right? We’ve forgiven them and have accepted that sometimes support will come from those you LEAST expected, or weren’t even expecting.

OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!

Cheers to acknowledging where I am…and being able to grow, because now I have clarity on where I stand.

I should really be saying… “Mac, look at the followers you DO have. The views you DO have. The people who ARE commenting.” — Who am I that even 50 people take the time to read, share and comment on MY thoughts. Who am I?

What if my blog seriously just encourages ONE person— or NO ONE at all…. then what? Do I stop writing? I thought I was writing because I actually LIKE TO WRITE and not because people are watching. — Another Heart Check.

Ms.McCullough— this is for you. Thank you for calling me out of my “petty-ness” and forcing me (unknowingly to you) to take a good look in the mirror and re-examine my motives for writing. I Love You. You shower me with that tough, raw, uncut, candid love… that “take two looks at that text you just sent” and ask myself “did she really just say that?” kinda love.

With all that being said… I have a #TMC post coming soon…. See you then… or Not, I’m going to write it anyway. #Growing

Yours Vulnerably,

The Naked Writer

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PS. Thanks for journey-ing  through life with me! If you know someone who might enjoy this, share my heart with them and remember to subscribe so we can keep in touch (top right corner)! Oh yeah and comment (top left corner)! You’d be surprised how your comments encourage other readers— because other readers, do read the comments! Don’t you? lol

 

17 Comments Add yours

  1. Alex says:

    This is deep! It takes a lot to take open up like this and I applaud you…. I’ll be the first (or 100th lol) to tell you this particular blog has definitely inspired me to “keep it 100”, most importantly with myself and to never focus on what may seem like negativity.

    Thank you for opening up and sharing, look forward to more of your posts!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aaaawwwww!!!! Thank You! This means a lot. So glad that you’re inspired! That encourages me!

      Like

  2. She Speaks says:

    “Cheers to acknowledging where I am…and being able to grow, because now I have clarity on where I stand.”

    Ayeeeeee *insert cabbage patch, running man, JuJu on that beat dance*

    Okay, I’m done. Come on #2…you indeed kept it “one-hunnen”. Thank you Ms. McCullough for keeping my friend accountable.

    Heart checks are annoying but necessary for the journey. Like when you about to drive an hour to church for something/someone outside of Jesus. Ha!

    On my changing the world journey, I had to check myself when I was wondering why I didn’t have more likes on my post, where’s my Nobel Peace Prize, why haven’t I been interviewed on a major network, etc.

    Ouch! Yikes! I thought I just wanted to serve God. Thankful for the Holy Spirit and friendships who hold me accountable.

    Thank you for not hanging the sign on this space. By the time I leave here, they gonna know all my business 😉 (insider).

    Love you #2

    Liked by 1 person

    1. #2… I’m telling you….lol. They gonna know ALL my business!!! (insider)

      “Like when you about to drive an hour to church for something/someone outside of Jesus. Ha!

      On my changing the world journey, I had to check myself when I was wondering why I didn’t have more likes on my post, where’s my Nobel Peace Prize, why haven’t I been interviewed on a major network, etc.”

      — So when you want to submit your guest blog? … hhhhmmmm

      Like

  3. Melludi says:

    I’m glad you had this chance to reflect. I think it’s definitely okay to desire the support of our friends, but wise to remember that people are who they are and can’t be made to do anything….That’ll start to mess with you if, like you’ve mentioned in this post, you don’t check your own motivation for writing in the first place. I know this blog is therapeutic for you as you write and release, and it’s certainly encouraging and relatable for us as readers. I always look forward to your posts so be encouraged!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aaawww Madam Melludi! Your poetic comments always leave me encouraged indeed!

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  4. Love this post!!! Such a great reminder to check my heart & motives, with any endeavor! Thanks for always keeping it real!!! So awesome to have friends who are unafraid to speak truth into our lives, when it matters most! Thank you for sharing the highs and lows of this journey! You are touching lives all over this great big world! As you’ve said, even if just ONE person is encouraged by your blog…that’s one life touched…one heart encouraged…one day brightened, etc. So unbelievably proud of you, lady!!!! Keep on keepin’ on!!! ❤️❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are quite the poet 💖 Your gift is definitely encouragement Romans 12:8 😘

      Like

  5. katsiaa says:

    Yes… I’m grateful for the mentors and friends who call me out when I’m loosing focus on why I do the things I love to do. Thanks for sharing your heart and always keeping it real.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes ma’am — we need those voices in our life! I try to keep it as authentic as I can 🙂

      Like

  6. Joelle says:

    We all need someone to make us reevaluate our reasons for doing things. When we lose sight of why, it is easy to become discouraged. Thank God for putting people in our lives who can help us check ourselves.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. When we lose sight of WHY— it’s easy to become discouraged. Hhmmm… #TwoSnaps

      Like

  7. I was thinking about something along similar lines the other day – about readership. When you said about “if only one person reads it, and it inspires them… is that enough? What about the 50 subscribers that you have and the 10 who always reads and enjoys your writing?” Sometimes you don’t realise the people you touch, and I think it’s worth it even if it touches only 1 or 2! Yes don’t get hung up about how many people… it will grow over time and it’s more important to enjoy your blogging and appreciating the people who are already supporting you even if it’s only a few. This is also a note to myself also to remember! 🙂 Thanks for putting out this post. It was good to reflect on this xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. “Sometimes you don’t realise the people you touch, and I think it’s worth it even if it touches only 1 or 2! ” —- That’s right! I need to keep that in mind!

      Right! It’s more important to ENJOY MY BLOGGING!!! and APPRECIATE THOSE WHO ARE ALREADY HERE– Exactly!

      Thanks Alicia 🙂

      PS. And how about the friend I made in the UK through blogging! You! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yay!!! You’re very welcome and I’m so glad we have found each other’s blogs and can connect! Speak soon my New Yorker friend! 😉 I’m just off to bed now- late one for me! Enjoy the rest of your week xx

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Ms. McCullough says:

    I just can’t with you! Lolol! However, I’m very happy to be reading a blog post from you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You know I LLLOOOVVVEEE You! Hahaha!

      Like

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